Do not allow your identity to form from worldly, temporary idles. Instead, realize that developing a permanent identity through Christ is exceptionally important, because He is a permanent God. A permanent identity cannot be taken away, and it automatically and gracefully completes voids that worldly satisfaction cannot compete with. An identity in God purposefully and rightfully defines who you are.
Personally, I once struggled with participating in worthless, meaningless, and sex filled relationships/ “situationships”. It was a vicious cycle that created an overabundance of confusion, heartache and ungodly soul ties. This was a cycle I was determined to break. I was tired of allowing every man that walked out of my life or every man that I pushed out of my life take a piece of my identity with him. After finally hitting rock bottom, I realized that the only option I had left was looking up. I completely surrendered to Christ and let Him form my identity. I prayed for God to sever the many ungodly soul ties that I once created, and I was determined to allow Him to transform me into the person I was created to be, knowing that this is giving my future “Adam” the ability of adding to my life as opposed to defining it.
I’m currently reading a book titled, Closed legs do get fed by D. Danyelle. This book discusses the nature of sex in a healthy, intended way, and it explains the importance of celibacy beyond the simple answer of, “because God says so”. Celibacy (the act of refraining from intercourse until marriage) enables a bond that reaches beyond sexual desires; a clear bond that is constructed from sincerely learning someone’s heart, soul and character without the cloudy complications and confusion immature and premarital sex can ignite.
Regardless of what temporary idol we choose to worship, God will forgive us as well as pave a way for healing. Surrender to God and let Him create something beautiful from what appears to be a chaotic mess. Always find comfort in knowing that God will never leave you, but rather we make the decision to abandon Him.
This is a journey that unfolds in its own time, Princess. The Lord will fight for you, and you need only to be still (Exodus 14:14). Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding (Proverbs 3:5). Let it go. God is worth it.
“I let go of all I have, just to have all of You
And no matter what the cost, I will follow You
Jesus, everything I’ve lost, I have found in You”.